Established 1914 - clearwatersun@yahoo.comDear Colonel Clearwater:You guys have been busy, posting every day! What are you anyway, a daily? But that's not my question. In your story on stadium horns, you called them vuvuzwelas, what is that funny looking symbol after the photo credits. Don't take this the wrong way, but it looks like bull. Which much of your paper really is. K. BrownDear Mr. Brown:Your comment reminded me of the guy who was using our little paper to line his parakeet cage.Let's get this straight. A vuvuzwala sounds like this. Bad huh? A kuduuzela (original tribal spelling - it's Kuduzela in English) sounds sweet like this. The imagage is not a bull, it's a gnu. This is the symbol for a licensed image.2.1 Here's a larger image:2.1 This is the symbol for a Gnu Free license. The image can be used freely, subject to some restrictive terms in the license, including crediting the photographer. The Sun is published four times a year. Both equinoxes, International Picnic Day and International Underdog Day. The website is updated often. The paper has about 200 readers; the website quite a few more. Thanks for reading.Colonel ClearwaterDear Colonel Clearwater: What is this stuff about Jim Cramer endorsing you hacks to "Jumpstart the Economy?" I saw the entire tape. It looks to me like he called on Curtis LeMay, Colonel Clearwater - and then realizing he had made a mistake - schluffed it into Colonel Kilgore. I bet you're gonna get your asses sued again. It does seem like good advise though. I'm going to look at getting a bike. $5 for gas sounds like a pretty good deal!!!! Buck TurgesonDear Mr. Turgeson: Jim Cramer doesn't make a lot of mistakes. (He did miss on CIT which went bankrupt a month after he touted it. And Wachovia shares went down 88 per cent, but hey, the bank is soon going to make a killing in foreclosed real estate anyway). Still he is known as a man who thinks on his feet. The old Tallahassee Democrat reporter must have had some real fire sparking in the synapses when he touted me for treasury. It was a great idea. I shoulda done this long ago. Click here to see his endorsement. Our new campaign stresses using local resources and finding products to substitute for brand name products. We will also be puncturing the false notice that supermarkets are only making a few cents markup on their sales. Keep reading and we will show you how to make your dollars go further in this economy.Colonel ClearwaterDear Colonel Clearwater: I was surprised to see your front page today. Counter-point, then point? What gives? I thought it went point - counter point? And how could your policy be so divergent? PanchoTechador Dear Mr. Techador,The Sun is a diverse group. We have a senior editor who's as far right as Attila the Hun. In fact I would have put my money on LD Sledge if he went mano-o-mano with the Hun. John Ruane, author of the Liberal Manifesto, is probably left of Mao-Tse Tung. Our publisher, who was a memeber of the Bull Moose Party in Clearwater (till it died from lack of renewal) is in the middle. We write about what people are doing (instead of the traditional what happened to them - "if it bleeds it leads" approach), what the out-of-town so called Clearwater papers miss, and are heavy into arts and humor. Normally, we would put "point" first and "counter-point" second. But sometimes something lights a fire under us. That's what happened to the publisher with the Supreme Court decision. It's also what happeded to Mr. Ruane when he read what Mr. Perry wrote. Me? I think John Ruane is right. I hope he pens the next "Point" soon. Then one of the others can write the counter-point reply and we can have some fun around here. Colonel Clearwater My Dear Colonel Clearwater: The purpose of this letter is to solicit you help in a matter of great importance to the American people. I think we should drop this "under God" stuff from the Pledge of Allegiance and go back to the original pledge. This is just big government shoving religion down our throats. When the founding fathers wrote the pledge, they meant it to be without god. Don't you agree? I haven't put my real name on this letter in order to protect myself from the Obama-Nazis/Socialists who would come after me for saying this. "Wild Bill" SteinhausDear Wild Bill: The founding fathers did not write the pledge. Francis Bellamy wrote it in 1892. He was a Baptist minister and a Christian socialist. Reverend Bellamy's original words are these: "I pledge allegiance to my Flag and the Republic for which it stands,one nation indivisible, with liberty and justice for all." There have been some changes: "to" was inserted by law before "the Republic" in 1892. Then in 1923 the word "the" was inserted before "flag" and "of the United States" was inserted after "flag." In 1924 the words "of America" was added after "United States." In 1954 "under God" was put after the word "nation." There's a couple other problems. President Obama is neither a Nazi or a Socialist. Also, Reverend Bellamy specified a way to salute the flag. Here's a photo of American school children using the original Bellamy salute:I think the photo speaks for itself. Colonel Clearwater Dear Colonel Clearwater: What do you think about the Egyptian revolution? Pablo Pizzicato Dear Pablo: Well I think the events in Egypt are promising. I'm not worried about the Muslim Brotherhood. Fundamentalists, in any religion, are usually a reaction to what the followers perceive as injustice. And this is true with all revolutions too; they are about injustice. This doesn't mean Egyptian society and culture will necessarily change; it is still their culture and values. But in the long run any thing they make of it will be for their benefit (and not the benefit of the United States). Colonel Clearwater Dear Colonel Clearwater: Michele Bachman has stated: "What I love about New Hampshire and what we have in common is our extreme love of liberty. You're the state where the shot was heard around the world in Lexington and Concord." That happened in Massachusetts, not New Hampshire. Is this this dumbest thing she has said?Harry PongDear Mr. Pong: No, the following statement was much dumber: "But we also know that the very founders that wrote those documents worked tirelessly until slavery was no more in the United States." She cited John Quincy Adams as an example. He was not a founding father. Many of the founding fathers were slave holders and the constitution they passed counted slaves as 3/5's of a person. Slavery wasn't abolished until the next century. (For more of her quotes, go to Buzzfeed by clicking here). Colonel ClearwaterDear Col. Clearwater:How did you get a great conservative like LD Sledge to serve as an editor? How could he possibly work on a liberal rag like the Sun? Especially with John Ruane. And I think I got you this time. There is no way John Ruane could have snuck into the Kremlin. The KGB would have never permitted it. Bill WixleyDear Mr. Wixley He got into the Kremlin with his Russian wife, Yulia. Not by rampeling down the side of the building like Tom Cruise, but by sliding in with a tourist visa when it was not open to tourists. It does get a little hot here in the newsroom from time to time. But John and LD worked it out like adults. When John lunged for him, LD cut off a piece of his ear. End of problem.Colonel ClearwaterDear Col. Clearwater: Republicans are betting that your readers don't care - that after all you did to beat them in 2006 and 2008, you're going to sit this one out. So they're whipping up their base by blocking help to unemployed workers, blocking summer jobs for teens, apologizing to the big companies that gave us the spill in the Gulf, and doing anything else they can do to stop progress. They're betting that they can excite their radical base and you won't respond. The stakes? Look no further than the truly radical candidates we're up against. Down in Kentucky, it's would-be Senator Rand Paul. Yes, that Rand Paul, who says freedom means a private business can discriminate against African-Americans, and that President Obama holding polluters accountable for the mess in the Gulf is "un-American." And he's not alone. All across the country, the Republican Party has turned dangerously radical. One candidate calls Social Security "horrible policy," while another has said that Americans will turn to "Second Amendment remedies" against Democrats. The Republican Party believes they have the upper hand; they've made no secret of the fact that they plan to repeal healthcare reform if they win back control of Congress. But we have great candidates, and if we all work at it, we will beat them. In Pennsylvania, Admiral Joe Sestak is running to keep Pennsylvania blue. In Illinois, Alexi Giannoulias is running hard to keep Barack Obama's seat Democratic. But we're not just playing defense. In New Hampshire, Paul Hodes is running neck-and-neck with his Republican opponent to take this seat for the Democrats. Each of these candidates will make the Senate work better for average Americans. We need to do more than just play defense. Years of GOP mismanagement dug a deep hole. We've just started to turn our country around, passing healthcare reform, working to hold the big banks accountable for the Wall Street meltdown, pushing legislation to address climate change and end our addiction to oil. The GOP is betting big that saying "no" and blocking progress is a path to success in November.What bet will you make? Please click here to contribute right now and make your voice heard.We've still got a lot of work to do.Thank you for all your help,John KerryDear Colonel Clearwater, I understand why the political emblem of the Democrats is a donkey. A donkey is slow to think and act, stubborn, and is often simply an ass. But I think the Republican emblem of an elephant does not reflect its agenda. I think the Republicans should adopt as their emblem the condom because it more clearly reflects the party's political stance. A condom stands for inflation, halts production, destroys the next generation, protects a bunch of pricks, and gives one a sense of security while screwing others. T. JeffersonDear Mr. T, Agreed. Colonel ClearwaterDear Colonel Clearwater, Last week, my friend and colleague, Congressman Anthony Weiner, did something very good, and very gutsy. He released a report on Goldline, Glenn Beck's prime advertising sponsor. Weiner's report showed that this firm, which sells gold coins, rips off its customers while benefiting directly from Beck's Chicken Little lunacy about the economy. Every time Beck screams that there is an impending Obama-led government takeover of the economy and your savings aren't safe, he's making a sales pitch for this sleazy advertiser. You see, Beck's ratings have recently crashed, and most of his reputable advertisers have deserted him. So he's resorted to scaring - and then cheating - his viewers. Now that he's been exposed, Beck has spent the last week using his big media platform to attack and undermine Weiner - he even set up an attack website designed to damage Weiner's political standing. This is what happens when someone with guts actually takes on power. Power strikes back.... This collusion between big media, conservative commentators, and quack economics is a scam, but it is powerful if it remains unopposed. And we need to support people like Weiner, who have the guts to go after right-wing lunacy at the source. Please support my friend Anthony. He showed guts. He deserves our support. Courage,Alan GraysonDear Alan, Glenn Beck makes your point better that you did. Consider his statement: "I beg you, look for the words 'social justice' or 'economic justice' on your church Web site. If you find it, run as fast as you can. Social justice and economic justice, they are code words.... 'Communists are on the left, and the Nazis are on the right.' That's what people say. But they both subscribe to one philosophy, and they flew one banner...On each banner, read the words, here in America: 'social justice.'" Personally, I think Mr. Beck is a lunatic. - Colonel ClearwaterDear Colonel Clearwater, "Faith is no more than developing pathways through doubt. That oil disaster must be stopped, and a way must be found."I am not the original author of that sensible thought, but it has been my favorite definition of faith for a while. We may all have different belief systems, but commonly we share doubt. While we have no way of certainty for moving past them, working to find a pathway that takes us beyond our doubts is the best option in my view. Scientists do it all the time. Michael Burke [Editors Note: Mr. Burke is a retired Clearwater professional civil rights worker.] Dear Michael,Thank you for your thoughts. Indeed we are all with you in spirit on stopping this oil leak. Colonel Clearwater Dear Colonel Clearwater: "I think we should just...go back to what our Founders and our founding documents meant. They're quite clear that we would create law based on the God of the Bible and the Ten Commandments. It's pretty simple." Sarah PalinDear Sarah, I'm sorry to tell you this Sarah, but the Founders did not base the law in this country on the God of the Bible and the Ten Commandments. Its pretty simple and obvious that they did not. The Founders left the local laws up to the states who based their laws on English common law. The Founders based our government and legal guidelines on a combination of Ancient Roman structure and the ideas of the French writers of the Enlightenment along with two British philosophers of the Enlightenment. They adopted from Voltaire the idea of freedom of speech and religious tolerance. From Montesquieu they adopted the idea of separation of powers, and that a free society can only exist where a general diffusion of civic virtue exists. From the British philosopher John Locke they adopted the idea that government should be the product of the common consent of free and equal men. The main Founders for the most part where not Christians. They were Deist. The worldview of Deist is that the Creator made the universe and just let it run by natural laws. The analogy was that the Creator was the watchmaker of the universe; He just created the universe, wound it up like a watch, and then let it run by natural laws. This was the view of Enlightenment thinkers. And this was the view of some of the Founders like Thomas Jefferson, Benjamin Franklin, John Adams, and Tom Paine. When Thomas Jefferson was about to be elected president in 1800, the Congregationalists minister who was the President of Yale University, said in his sermon that: Can serious and reflecting men look about them and doubt that, if Jefferson is electedthat those morals which protect our lives from the knife of the assassin, which guard the chastity of our wives and daughters from seduction and violence, defend our property from plunder and devastation and shield our religion from contempt and profanation, will not be trampled upon? For what end?that our churches may become temples of reasonthe Bible cast into a bonfire that we may see our wives and daughters the victims of legal prostitution? Shall our sons become the disciples of Voltaire? Thomas Jefferson was despised by Christians. To claim that the Founders were quite clear that we would create law based on the God of the Bible and the Ten Commandments is bearing false witness. It is a lie, and therefore a sin. Colonel Clearwater Dear Colonel Clearwater, I know you said that our countrys laws and structure were not founded on the God of the Bible and the Ten commandments. Then how come Congress starts each session with a prayer and the president is sworn in on a Bible? Wants to KnowDear Wants to Know, As I said in an earlier reply, our countrys laws and structure are not based on the God of the Bible and the Ten Commandments, as Sarah Palin and others claim. But our culture is based on Judeo-Christian customs, traditions, and beliefs. There is no law that says we may not work on Sunday as the Bible tells us. But there is a custom that we honor the Sabbath per our Judeo-Christian beliefs. So most of us do not work on Sunday and some businesses are not open for business on Sunday. But other business are, and some do work on Sunday. The National Football league plays on Sunday. This is a secular custom. Secular here means not related to a religion. So we have a religious custom of not working on Sunday and a secular custom of watching football on Sunday. Congress opens each session with a prayer; this is a religious custom, not a law. It is a tradition that the President takes his oath on a Bible. The Constitution states that the president must take an oath, but it does not mention anything about a Bible. Taking an oath on a Bible is a tradition based on our Judeo-Christian beliefs. But it is not the law. Colonel ClearwaterDear Colonel Clearwater, I understand you answer, but you say customs and traditions. Arent they the same thing? Wants to Know MoreDear Wants to Know More, It is important to realize the difference between a custom and a tradition. A custom is an activity that develops over time from the habits of people. It is a custom at my house that every year we watch football on Thanksgiving Day after we eat. A tradition is a ceremony invented for the purpose of commemorating some historical event or to develop a sense of binding in a community or religious group. Thanksgiving Day is a tradition in America that serves the purpose of reminding us of what we have from God for which to be thankful and is loosely based on the first harvest feast of the Pilgrims to celebrate their first year of survival in the New World. Whether the first Thanksgiving actually took place or not is irrelevant. It is a tradition; a ceremony we use to create a common bond among Americans by commemorating our heritage. Customs can develop out of traditions, such as watching football every Thanksgiving Day. Last, but not least, are conventions. A convention is a procedure practice by a group. When Congress meets, the first thing that happens is that the designated speaker calls the group together. This is a convention. Then a prayer is said. This is a custom. If they were to then recite the Pledge of Allegiance, that would be a tradition. At this point the politicians start to lie. But this is done purely out of habit. Colonel Clearwater [Editorial note; As I recall, it is Col. Clearwater's Thanksgiving custom is to eat dinner at my house. Publisher] Dear Colonel Clearwater,I am only 8 years old. My teenage sister has a boyfriend who is a year older than she is. Sometimes my sister and her boyfriend take off all their clothes and go behind our barn. Can you tell me what I should do to stop them from peeing on our hay? Luke McCoyDear Luke, Your facts may be correct, but your conclusion is all wrong. Colonel ClearwaterDear Colonel Clearwater, I have just seen a video about an organization called the Council on Foreign Relations. This organization has members who were past Presidents and past Secretary of States of the United States, plus leaders in the fields of finance, industry, and other important positions in society. The spokesman on the video has concluded that this organization must be a part of world conspiracy to take over the world and put the entire world under a one-world socialist government and I agree with him. What can we do to stop this organization from raining on our parade? Alex J.Dear Alex, Your facts may be correct, but your conclusion is all wrong. The Council on Foreign Relations (CFR) is an organization of foreign policy experts, people concerned with international trade, prominent historians and writers, as well as others who are involved with foreign policy and international affairs. The CFR hold speaking events with question-and-answer periods which are usually televised on CSpan or other cable stations. The speakers are usually world leaders, historians, writers, or others involved in international affairs. Some of the speakers have included such figures as Nelson Mandela, George Soros, Thomas Friedman, Mikhail Gorbachev, and Ronald Reagan. The CFR publishes a journal six times a year called Foreign Affairs. The journal, which I have subscribed to and read for over 25 years (plus you can buy it at the newsstands in Borders or Barnes and Noble) provides a forum for contrasting views and opinions regarding issues affecting foreign policy. Some people have made a nice living scarring others with conspiracy theories about the CFR. My advice to you is to go to the store, buy and read their journal, watch their events on CSpan, and be wary of people who wish to sell you on the idea that other people are out to get you. Colonel Clearwater________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________Dear Colonel Clearwater: Cancel my subscription to your liberal rage. To quote Rudy Giuliani, "A nuclear-free world has been a 60-year dream of the Left, just like socialized healthcare." Keep your damn pipedreams!Wilma G.Madame G. "A nuclear world war cannot be won and must never be fought. And no matter how great the obstacles may seem, we must never stop our efforts to reduce the weapons of war. We must never stop at all until we see the day when nuclear arms have been banished from the face of this earth." Ronald Wilson Reagan, 1984 Colonel ClearwaterDear Colonel Clearwater: Liberals? I am as liberal as they come, but i gotta ask - WHO would not be outraged by this MURDER? We financed this murdering of defenseless fish in a barrel. I could not be more ashamed of the human race at this moment. I realize that there is collateral damage in war, but this is no less than cold-blooded genocide. Shame on us for allowing this to happen on our watch! Mac McNamaraDear Colonel Clearwater: It is tragic, very, very tragic. But what is written by the editors gives the impression, it seems, that these soldiers were out joy riding. That is not the case. they did not fire until they were given permission to fire. They operated by the book. The soldiers are not abnormal men in a normal situation. They are normal men in an abnormal situation. Damn the people who started the Iraqi war atrocity and damn the Americans who supported this war. The blood is on their hands. If you supported this war, even without giving it much thought, it is no different that the German people who supported the war against Poland, France, Holland, Belgium, etc. It was done one country at a time. Complacently saying, "We should do it. We agree," without much thought is no different than the German people who followed Hitler. The blood is on your hands. In fact, it's worse, because the German people did not have all the information and they had no choice in the matter. In this country the politicians can't invade other countries without popular support. Let's beg God's mercy that we don't get what we deserve.John RuaneDear Mac and John, Thank you both for your thoughts. We forwarded the WikiLeak link to some of our readers. The journalism has been reported flawless. Obtaining the video is journalism at its best. The WikiLink written comments added at the end of the film interpret the video to fit a preconceived notion. The soldiers were not shooting at civilians. They were shooting at insurgents who, upon later investigation, turned out to be civilians. By saying the soldiers were shooting civilans implies that they knew they were shooting civiliansj. This is not a moot point. By putting the blame on the soldiers, one is absolving the real guilty party. The real guilty party are those who convinced the American public that this war was necessary and just. Any American who supported a country who did not attack us, must share responsibility. In the words of the Greek writer Euripides:When the people vote on war, nobody reckonsOn his own death; it is too soon; he thinksSome other man will meet that wretched fate.But if death faced him when he cast his votes,Hellas would never perish from battle-madness.And yet we men all know which of two wordsIs better, and can weigh the good and the badThey bring: how much better is peace than war!First and foremost, the Muses love her best;And the goddess of vengeance hates her. She delightsIn healthy children, and she glories in wealth.But wickedly we throw all this awayTo start our wars and make the losers slaves--Man binding man and city chaining city.--Euripides, Suppliant Women(Hellas is the name for Greece)Other readers are invited to watch the video. Beware. It's the bloodiest thing I've seen since Antitem. Link to Wikileak and VideoColonel ClearwaterDear Colonel Clearwater:Thanks for reporting the WikiLeak video. Can you tell me how the "Smallest of the World's Leading Newspapers" managed to scoop "Florida's Best Newspaper?" Pedro TechadorDear Pedro, Always nice to hear from one of the Techadors.This was a WikiLeak scoop. Two of the killed journalists in the incident worked for Reuters. Reuters tried to get the video by using the Freedom of Information Act without success. The WikiLeak whistle-blower group got it. It costs some sixty bucks for us to buy stock photos from Reuters. We haven't bought any yet, but the resource is available. The out-of-town newspaper you referred to, the St. Petersburg Times, charges us $200 for the same service. We haven't bought any photo rights from them either. But the point is,we scooped them because we are small, quick and agile and can tell the tale. They are slow, cumbersome and "too big to tale."The video is quite graphic and explosive. It will be interesting to see if the out-of-town paper will report it tomorrow. Consider yourself (at least) one day smarter than the other guy's readers.Colonel ClearwaterDear Colonel Clearwater, You say you are a colonel. Whats your army? I think youre just the leader of Sergeant Peppers Bleeding Hearts Club Band? I bet you think we havent reached enough equality in this country already. I bet you think Glen Beck is just a low I.Q. glorified game show host. I bet you think that we arent the best educated country on earth. You probably even think that Obama was born in this country and that his birth certificate, vaccine records, and school records are real. It is because of people like you that Americas are never satisfied and are always looking to improve things. A true conservativeDear A: Yes! Colonel Clearwater Dear Colonel Clearwater: What I dislike most about Obamacare though is this notion that the leftists in Washington think that they can pass this thing through, cram it through, with disregard to consider the will of the people, disregard of these constitutional legal traditional processes which have thus far been used in America's processes to allow policy to be adopted that do adhere to the will of the people. Sarah PalinDear Ms. Palin:Your statement reminds me of what Republican Congressman, Devin Nunes said during the health care vote. "For most of the 20th century people fled the ghosts of communist dictators. And now you are bringing the ghosts back into this chamber." There is no polite way to get around this. Tea Party Patriots are morons when it comes to history, economics, and how to run a society. You chose the Barracuda theme song. Have you ever listened to the words? Tiki Parrot's photo illustration video, though not artfully titled, says it best. Colonel ClearwaterDear Colonel Clearwater:What's going on with The Tea Party movement. And what do you think about the health care vote. Carlos TechadorDear Senor Techador: Your letter caused quite a stir in the pressroom. The editor and the political editor got into quite an argument about how to answer. When the publisher chimed in, the editor cut off a piece of his ear and I stepped in. Tea Party Patriots are about nostalgia for the days of white power. Much like the resurgence of the Ku Klux Klan after World War I, the Tea Party Patriots are people who believe they have lost their privileged status in American society and wish to thwart others hopes for the American dream. Unfortunately, or fortunately (depending on which editor yells loudest) President Obama considers Wall Street, the banks, the Republicans in congress, and those with tea party policies as necessary players in the solution when they are, in fact, part of the problem. Colonel ClearwaterDear Colonel Clearwater:The House of Representatives is going to pass the new health care bill without a vote Sunday. Is that legal? Isn't this act proof that President Obama isn't effective. M.S. FloydDear Mr. Floyd. I can tell that you watch Faux News. This procedure is quite legal. It's been used by Republicans more often than Democrats. Both the Senior Citizens' Right to Work Act and the Family Medical Leave Act were passed this way. As a rule I don't quote fools, but even Glen Beck has admitted that the process IS a vote. "They are going to VOTE for this damn thing on a Sunday, which is the Sabbath, during Lent... This is an affront to God." [emphasis added]The United States has no established religion. Many religions have the Sabbath on Saturdays. For others, every day is a sabbath. At the inception of the Obama administration, Faux News communicated questioningly that the president was a terrorists because of a "fist bump" and that he was not really the president because of a few flubbed words in the oath ceremony. What the administration is doing is creating a major reform of the the Amrican health care system. No one has ever done this before. The entrenched interests of the docs and the hospitals (the doc's workshop) have always prevented this. It's a major accomplishment.That being said, there are problems with the bill. Psychiatrists are feeding at the trough more. This is especially worrisome since the Book of Human Ills - the list of treatable diseases - has a host of new ailments. There are people who are angry people. Now, it's a disease - Intermittent explosive disorder . Years ago, it was drapetomania - an slave's urge to escape captivity. We will know on Sunday just how much health care is left in the bill after it's adopted. We urge the president to pursue major reform of the drug companies next. In the mean time, I would suggest that you find a new news source. I recommend the BBC. Colonel Clearwater I've heard that Bill Gates has spent millions on developing a vaccine against malaria. I've heard some rumors, but was wondering if you know the facts. Billy G.Dear Billy,It exists. The "Microsoft Vaccine" [my words, not Bill's] is in its last trial phase, called "Phase 3." Exactly how good Vacine 1.3 is has not been published. However, Mr. Gates reports that within three years, Vacine 2013 will be "partly effective." A fully effective vaccine, will not exist for 5 to 10 years, according to a recent BBC report. More people have been killed by mosquitoes than all the bullets in war. Any effectiveness will save lives. Lets hope that the Vista Vaccine is better than the Vista software. I may sound sour here, not nearly sour as some. Look at this pie chart graphic. Colonel ClearwaterDear Colonel Clearwater:Did President Obama move faster with the Haiti earthquake victims than President Bush did with the Katrina hurricane victims? Bambi Baird Dear Bambi; Yes, Bambi, he did. He even moved faster than Mr. Bush did on 9/11. President Obama is smart and his hands are full. Mr. Bush was slow and his head was empty. Colonel ClearwaterDear Colonel Clearwater: I'm worried. What's the biggest problem facing our country? Conservatism, Liberalism, religious extremism or corporatism? (I'm an Obama man, please withhold my name. Our boss has taken revenge against others like me.) An American Patriot Dear Mr. Patriot: There is no truth to the rumor that the root word of "patriot" is riot. I saw the survey. The Founding Fathers were both conservative and liberals, and they made sure in the Constitution that religious extremists would never gain authority of the laws. But corporatism didn't exist back then. It has ruined our economy with phony finance and by shipping our industry overseas. Corporatism's greed is at the core of every U.S. problem from debt, healthcare, prisons and education. Colonel ClearwaterDear Colonel Clearwater:A recent Yahoo survey said the way to balance the national debt and lower the country's deficit is through the elimination of waste. What do you think? Doc DeveruauxDear Doc:YaaaaaaaHooooooooooo!!!! I saw the survey. That 81% of the people think cutting waste and fraud would be enough to balance the budget and lower the debt is the problem. These things are just a drop in the bucket to the deficit and debt. The public is unbelievablely unknowledgeable. That is the problem. Colonel ClearwaterDear Colonel Clearwater:Back when I got into journalism, the idea that a fistfight in a newsroom would turn into a news story was unthinkable. The guys in the sports department at the New York Daily News, they had so many, you wouldn't even look up. What's your paper's policy on hitting reporters? Henry AllenDear Mr. AllenI saw where you expressed surprise at coverage of your punching a reporter over at WaPo. It's similar here at the Sun. In fact, we have a sign posted in our news room that says "The beatings will continue until morale improves." Colonel ClearwaterDear Colonel Clearwater,I'm confused. President Obama won the Nobel Peace Prize but didn't do anything to deserve it. I think he just won because he was a Democrat. What do you think?Sincerely,Johnnie R. Dear Johnnie;Henry Kissinger, a Republican, won the Nobel Peach Prize too. And this even though 21,000 American soldiers died AND we invaded Cambodia. All on his watch. Col. ClearwaterDear Colonel Clearwater,Hi. I have Windows Vista and I hate it. It has been glitchy and a pain to use. Now they're coming out with something new to replace that dog. I need you advice. Should I stay with Vista or should I get the new stuff? Sincerely,SuzieDear Suzie;You're not the only one who feels that way. Here's what you should do. Get a Mac and forget about Windows. If you can't do that, get ride of windows and reinstall XP. As far as Windows 7 is concerned, the Sun computer consultant, Kelly Wilson, says "Wait six months for Microsoft to get the bugs out." Given their sordid history of shipping products with problems, this sounds like good advice. If you need installation help or repairs give Kelly a call. 727-641-3764. He's a wizard. Col. ClearwaterDear Colonel Clearwater,Hi. I'm a liberal and I have heard Glen Beck speak on monopoly and such. What he says makes me feel bad, but he seems so confident. Should I take him seriously? Sincerely,Mac Heart of ClearwaterDear Mac,An oligarchy is similar to a monopoly except that instead of a one owner monopoly there are two, three or a few. As to Mr. Beck, ignore his addictions and treatment. Ignore the fact that family members have become sick or committed suicide. Ignore his attention deficit disorder and his racist comments. We should let Mr. Beck's words stand for themselves: "O-- L-- I --G --A --R-- H. One letter is missing...The one that's missing is Y. I don't know if we're turning into an oligarchy or what we're turning into. But unless you ask "Why?" we're going to transform into something."And now you can ignore Mr. Beck.Colonel Clearwater<===================>Dear Colonel Clearwater,I am in trouble with my bank on the mortgage. I was thinking about getting help from a loan modification helping company, but I'm worried about scams. What do you think"Buck TurgesonDear Buck;The Sun's editor, LD Sledge recently wrote the following. I hope it helps. Good luck to you. "What is loan modification? A mortgage lender may modify the mortgage for a homeowner in one or more of the following ways: Interest rate reduction, extension of loan terms, delinquent payment forgiveness, conversion of adjustable rate into fixed rate loans, principal reduction, and forbearance agreements. Any of these methods can help the stressed homeowner on the brink of foreclosure and bankruptcy. Over ten percent of the homeowners in the United States are in foreclosure because they cannot pay their mortgage note on time. Many are in denial about their situation and refusing to accept their plight, they are paying their monthly note from their retirement or savings. Everyone is a candidate for loan modification, even if they are not behind on payments. It doesnt affect ones credit. Some feel it is demeaning to even consider it, preferring to go into foreclosure, which is a stain on ones credit forever, and is worse than bankruptcy. Banks do not want to own or hold property. They will compromise to avoid having a house in their inventory, and will negotiate. The government also pays the companies servicing mortgages for every loan they modify. There are reputable loan modification experts who will help the beleaguered home owner who know how to negotiate the best deal for the homeowner. They charge a fixed fee, which varies between negotiation companies. Getting the interest reduced substantially, the monthly payments lowered, and delinquent payments forgiven can make a huge difference in a family budget, and a standard of living. Dealing with the bank or mortgage company can be daunting. The individual homeowner may achieve a fair result, but he or she usually lacks experience needed to effect a significant change. It would pay to investigate these possibilities, and find a reputable company to negotiate the modification."Colonel Clearwater, C.S.A., Rtd. Dear Colonel Clearwater:Thanks for answering my last letter on torture. Any updates since then?Have the Republicans admitted wrongdoing? Phil ChestnutDear Phil;No change.Condoleezza Rice said "[President Bush] was very clear that we would do nothing -- nothing -- that was against the law or against our obligations internationally... He was only willing to authorize policies that were legal in order to protect the country," As Secretary of State, she was among the top Bush advisers who gave a green light to waterboarding. Reminds me of another, similar quote."When the president does it, that means it is not illegal," by Richard M. Nixon. Colonel Clearwater Dear Colonel Clearwater:What's the big deal with torturing our 911 enemies in Iraq? Dick Cheney says the information worked and that President Obama should release the secret documents that say torture should work. What's your take on this? Phil Chestnut Dear Mr. Chestnut:The former vice-president should not be airing the contents of any secret federal documents. I believe that's a crime. Secondly, his boss once said, "Torture anywhere is an affront to human dignity everywhere... I call on all governments to join with the United States and the community of law-abiding nations in prohibiting, investigating, and prosecuting all acts of torture." George W. Bush, June 2003If the shoe fits.... Colonel ClearwaterDear Colonel Clearwater:Hey man! Obama is raising taxes on wealthy Americans up to a whopping 39.6%. That has to be socialism. It's looks to me like Rush was right again. As usual. What does your liberal rag of a newspaper have to say? Please withhold my name. I work for a guy who actually likes your paper and I don't want to get axed. I saw where you did this for a democrat, I hope you have the integrity to do it for a republican. Name Withheld by RequestDear Withhold,Obama isn't raising taxes on the rich. He's rolling the rate back in the direction it used to be. End of Ronald Reagan's first term: 50%. Under the administration of Richard Nixon: 70%. In the administration of Dwight Eisenhower: 91% "I hope he fails!" is the mantra of your party.In the Clinton years it was "Get Clinton." No nominations approved, just tons of money spent to prosecute the man for an investment in which he lost some $80,000. There was a time when presidential sex lives were not part of the public press. Then a girl was egged into not sending her dress to the cleaners. This was not about the good of the country. It was about achieving a political agenda and the public good be damned. And that's where we are again. It's time to instill confidence, not to undermine it. Instead it will be four more years of astro-turfing, Faux News and rallying behind a moron to reinstate another era of greed, torture and war. Colonel Clearwater Dear Colonel Clearwater:Republicans are touting Rush Limbaugh as the philosophical and intellectual lynch pin of their party; a paragon of political analysis; and an all around good egg. What is your opinion? Carlos Techador Dear Seor Techador:Thank you for your kind inquiry. I think Mr. Limbaugh is a raving lunatic who has helped trash the party of Abraham Lincoln. He is partly responsible for my leaving the party and joining the Bull Moose Party (which, alas, has expired in recent years, making me an independent.) I also think he is a great source of amusement. For example, this recent diatribe: "Jake Tapper is the one guy that's outside of the butt boy bubble in the White House press room." Colonel Clearwater Dear Colonel Clearwater: What do you think of this? There is a bill right now being introduced to the Florida Senate that would require all dogs and cats to be neutered by the age of four months. This would eliminate all the responsible hobby breeders, such as myself, from Florida, as we would not be able to pay the hundreds of dollars yearly required to keep intact animals. I would no longer breed Silkys. When you would be ready for your next dog, you would have to go out of state. And Florida's success in passage would embolden the Animal Rightists -- these are the guys who feel that you and your dog have EQUAL rights -- and they would work all the harder harder to get similar bills passed in every state. So then where would you get your next dog? Now is the time to stand up and say -- no. California tried to pass such a bill requiring mandatory spay/neuter last year and it did not pass because there was a groundswell of outrage against it. I urge you, if you value your rights as a dog owner to contact your State Representative and State Senator and say no -- and tell them why. I have attached excellent sample letters from the AKC to help you. They do need to be personalized, however! You can find your State Representative and State Senator by going on www.myforida.com. So please, if you value your rights as a dog owner, let Tallahassee know loud and clear how you feel. Not only I thank you, but your next dog will thank you too. Best, Sandy Mesmerwww.sandymesmer.comwww.bergstromgallery.comDear Sandy, Thank you for your letter. I find Mr. Randolph's bill somewhat baffling. The proposed law penalizes pet owners across the board, whether they are responsible in regard to breeding or not. It also comes down heavily on mutts. I like mutts. They often come from the deep end of the gene pool. Here are forms to write both senators and representatives. Form Letter for Senator Form Letter For Representative Colonel ClearwaterDear Colonel Clearwater: If you're a Clearwater newspaper how come I can't find your paper anywhere? And how come your mail goes to Safety Harbor. What are you? Some kind of "out-of-town" newspaper? C.P.Dear Mr.CP:For the print edition, send $25 to my agent, Moons of Pluto publishing company for a subscription (address above). It includes a free ad, link, obituary, etc. My agent has a Safety Harbor address because it's closer to his Clearwater home. The Sun is a Clearwater paper. Colonel ClearwaterDear Colonel Clearwater: I see where a journalist, an Iraqi cameraman, threw his shoes at President Bush. This seems pretty outrageous to me. Isn't this a crime in Iraq? I mean, isn't the guy toast? Do you guys at the Sun ever do anything rash? Melvin ShatzDear Mr. Shatz: Ohhhhh! That is a tough question. The US has promised freedom of speech for Iraq following the fall of Saddam, according to the Iraq press. Throwing shoes at someone is the worst insult an Arab can hurl. The TV station the guy worked for is arguing for his release on those grounds. He is being interrogated, so it is possible he is being tortured. The Human Rights Watch has reported that Iraq justice is failing in the fall of Saddam with pretrial torture, no speedy trial and no provision for an effective defense attorney. Of course on the other hand, if he had thrown his shoes at Saddam, death by pecking of crows would likely have been administered summarily. We never do anything rash here at the Sun. But reporters used to be rash. In fact, back in the eighties the paper had a motto "We're Making News." We parody that with our extra editions ("We're Making Gnus" and "We Print All the Gnus That Fit.") Currently, we do not prosecute presidential insulters in the USA. In our culture, however, throwing shoes at someone would be an assault (and battery if the shoes had hit the target). You know how Barack Obama says that we only have one president at a time? Well Representative Barney Frank said that Barack Obama "...overstates the number of presidents we have." By the way, our president was recently shoed in effigy in Iran." Colonel Clearwater Dear Colonel Clearwater:I see where people accuse you of being a "liberal rag." I live out of town and haven't seen enough of your paper issues to form an opinion. I can say that your newspaper does seem like a cross between Boy's Life and The Onion. Ron Saper Dear Mr. Saper:Thank you for your polite letter. Others are often more like Jerry Springer Show participants. I enclose a back issue for your enjoyment. Colonel ClearwaterThe artist, who can be seen approaching, makes her living from the sale of photographs. The important thing to realize is that when someone photographs their work (photos, art, whatever) it hurts their business and deprives them of income from their images.Valuable links for election information:Political truth-o-meter

The Clearwater Sun - Smallest of the World's Leading Newspapers

Established 1914
Clearwater's Oldest Newspaper

clearwatersun@yahoo.com

Dear Colonel Clearwater:

You guys have been busy, posting every day! What are you anyway, a daily? But that's not my question. In your story on stadium horns, you called them vuvuzwelas, what is that funny looking symbol after the photo credits. Don't take this the wrong way, but it looks like bull. Which much of your paper really is.

K. Brown

Dear Mr. Brown:Your comment reminded me of the guy who was using our little paper to line his parakeet cage.

Let's get this straight. A vuvuzwala sounds like this. Bad huh? A kuduuzela (original tribal spelling - it's Kuduzela in English) sounds sweet like this. The imagage is not a bull, it's a gnu. This is the symbol for a licensed image.2.1 Here's a larger image:

2.1

This is the symbol for a Gnu Free license. The image can be used freely, subject to some restrictive terms in the license, including crediting the photographer.

The Sun is published four times a year. Both equinoxes, International Picnic Day and International Underdog Day. The website is updated often. The paper has about 200 readers; the website quite a few more. Thanks for reading.

Colonel Clearwater

Dear Colonel Clearwater:

What is this stuff about Jim Cramer endorsing you hacks to "Jumpstart the Economy?" I saw the entire tape. It looks to me like he called on Curtis LeMay, Colonel Clearwater - and then realizing he had made a mistake - schluffed it into Colonel Kilgore. I bet you're gonna get your asses sued again. It does seem like good advise though. I'm going to look at getting a bike. $5 for gas sounds like a pretty good deal!!!!

Buck Turgeson

Dear Mr. Turgeson:

Jim Cramer doesn't make a lot of mistakes. (He did miss on CIT which went bankrupt a month after he touted it. And Wachovia shares went down 88 per cent, but hey, the bank is soon going to make a killing in foreclosed real estate anyway). Still he is known as a man who thinks on his feet. The old Tallahassee Democrat reporter must have had some real fire sparking in the synapses when he touted me for treasury. It was a great idea. I shoulda done this long ago. Click here to see his endorsement.

Our new campaign stresses using local resources and finding products to substitute for brand name products. We will also be puncturing the false notice that supermarkets are only making a few cents markup on their sales. Keep reading and we will show you how to make your dollars go further in this economy.

Colonel Clearwater

Dear Colonel Clearwater:

I was surprised to see your front page today. Counter-point, then point? What gives? I thought it went point - counter point? And how could your policy be so divergent? PanchoTechador

Dear Mr. Techador,

The Sun is a diverse group. We have a senior editor who's as far right as Attila the Hun. In fact I would have put my money on L D Sledge if he went mano-o-mano with the Hun. John Ruane, author of the Liberal Manifesto, is probably left of Mao-Tse Tung. Our publisher, who was a memeber of the Bull Moose Party in Clearwater (till it died from lack of renewal) is in the middle. We write about what people are doing (instead of the traditional what happened to them - "if it bleeds it leads" approach), what the out-of-town so called Clearwater papers miss, and are heavy into arts and humor. Normally, we would put "point" first and "counter-point" second. But sometimes something lights a fire under us. That's what happened to the publisher with the Supreme Court decision. It's also what happeded to Mr. Ruane when he read what Mr. Perry wrote. Me? I think John Ruane is right. I hope he pens the next "Point" soon. Then one of the others can write the counter-point reply and we can have some fun around here.

Colonel Clearwater

My Dear Colonel Clearwater:

The purpose of this letter is to solicit you help in a matter of great importance to the American people.

I think we should drop this "under God" stuff from the Pledge of Allegiance and go back to the original pledge. This is just big government shoving religion down our throats. When the founding fathers wrote the pledge, they meant it to be without god. Don't you agree? I haven't put my real name on this letter in order to protect myself from the Obama-Nazis/Socialists who would come after me for saying this.

"Wild Bill" Steinhaus

Dear Wild Bill:

The founding fathers did not write the pledge. Francis Bellamy wrote it in 1892. He was a Baptist minister and a Christian socialist. Reverend Bellamy's original words are these:

"I pledge allegiance to my Flag and the Republic for which it

stands,one nation indivisible, with liberty and justice for all."

There have been some changes: "to" was inserted by law before "the Republic" in 1892. Then in 1923 the word "the" was inserted before "flag" and "of the United States" was inserted after "flag." In 1924 the words "of America" was added after "United States." In 1954 "under God" was put after the word "nation."

There's a couple other problems. President Obama is neither a Nazi or a Socialist. Also, Reverend Bellamy specified a way to salute the flag. Here's a photo of American school children using the original Bellamy salute:

I think the photo speaks for itself.

Colonel Clearwater

Dear Colonel Clearwater:

What do you think about the Egyptian revolution?

Pablo Pizzicato

Dear Pablo:

Well I think the events in Egypt are promising. I'm not worried about the Muslim Brotherhood. Fundamentalists, in any religion, are usually a reaction to what the followers perceive as injustice. And this is true with all revolutions too; they are about injustice. This doesn't mean Egyptian society and culture will necessarily change; it is still their culture and values. But in the long run any thing they make of it will be for their benefit (and not the benefit of the United States). Colonel Clearwater

Dear Colonel Clearwater:

Michele Bachman has stated:

"What I love about New Hampshire and what we have in common is our extreme love of liberty. You're the state where the shot was heard around the world in Lexington and Concord."

That happened in Massachusetts, not New Hampshire. Is this this dumbest thing she has said?

Harry Pong

Dear Mr. Pong:

No, the following statement was much dumber:

"But we also know that the very founders that wrote those documents worked tirelessly until slavery was no more in the United States."

She cited John Quincy Adams as an example. He was not a founding father. Many of the founding fathers were slave holders and the constitution they passed counted slaves as 3/5's of a person. Slavery wasn't abolished until the next century.

(For more of her quotes, go to Buzzfeed by clicking here).

Colonel Clearwater

Dear Col. Clearwater:

How did you get a great conservative like LD Sledge to serve as an editor? How could he possibly work on a liberal rag like the Sun? Especially with John Ruane. And I think I got you this time. There is no way John Ruane could have snuck into the Kremlin. The KGB would have never permitted it.

Bill Wixley

Dear Mr. Wixley

He got into the Kremlin with his Russian wife, Yulia. Not by rampeling down the side of the building like Tom Cruise, but by sliding in with a tourist visa when it was not open to tourists.

It does get a little hot here in the newsroom from time to time. But John and LD worked it out like adults. When John lunged for him, LD cut off a piece of his ear. End of problem.

Colonel Clearwater

Dear Col. Clearwater:

Republicans are betting that your readers don't care - that after all you did to beat them in 2006 and 2008, you're going to sit this one out.
So they're whipping up their base by blocking help to unemployed workers, blocking summer jobs for teens, apologizing to the big companies that gave us the spill in the Gulf, and doing anything else they can do to stop progress. They're betting that they can excite their radical base and you won't respond.
The stakes? Look no further than the truly radical candidates we're up against. Down in Kentucky, it's would-be Senator Rand Paul. Yes, that Rand Paul, who says freedom means a private business can discriminate against African-Americans, and that President Obama holding polluters accountable for the mess in the Gulf is "un-American."
And he's not alone. All across the country, the Republican Party has turned dangerously radical. One candidate calls Social Security "horrible policy," while another has said that Americans will turn to "Second Amendment remedies" against Democrats.
The Republican Party believes they have the upper hand; they've made no secret of the fact that they plan to repeal healthcare reform if they win back control of Congress. But we have great candidates, and if we all work at it, we will beat them.

In Pennsylvania, Admiral Joe Sestak is running to keep Pennsylvania blue. In Illinois, Alexi Giannoulias is running hard to keep Barack Obama's seat Democratic. But we're not just playing defense. In New Hampshire, Paul Hodes is running neck-and-neck with his Republican opponent to take this seat for the Democrats.
Each of these candidates will make the Senate work better for average Americans. We need to do more than just play defense. Years of GOP mismanagement dug a deep hole. We've just started to turn our country around, passing healthcare reform, working to hold the big banks accountable for the Wall Street meltdown, pushing legislation to address climate change and end our addiction to oil. The GOP is betting big that saying "no" and blocking progress is a path to success in November.

What bet will you make? Please click here to contribute right now and make your voice heard.

We've still got a lot of work to do.

Thank you for all your help,

John Kerry
Dear Colonel Clearwater,

I understand why the political emblem of the Democrats is a donkey. A donkey is slow to think and act, stubborn, and is often simply an ass. But I think the Republican emblem of an elephant does not reflect its agenda.
I think the Republicans should adopt as their emblem the condom because it more clearly reflects the party's political stance. A condom stands for inflation, halts production, destroys the next generation, protects a bunch of pricks, and gives one a sense of security while screwing others.

T. Jefferson

Dear Mr. T,
Agreed.
Colonel Clearwater

Dear Colonel Clearwater,

Last week, my friend and colleague, Congressman Anthony Weiner, did something very good, and very gutsy. He released a report on Goldline, Glenn Beck's prime advertising sponsor. Weiner's report showed that this firm, which sells gold coins, rips off its customers while benefiting directly from Beck's Chicken Little lunacy about the economy. Every time Beck screams that there is an impending Obama-led government takeover of the economy and your savings aren't safe, he's making a sales pitch for this sleazy advertiser.
You see, Beck's ratings have recently crashed, and most of his reputable advertisers have deserted him. So he's resorted to scaring - and then cheating - his viewers. Now that he's been exposed, Beck has spent the last week using his big media platform to attack and undermine Weiner - he even set up an attack website designed to damage Weiner's political standing.
This is what happens when someone with guts actually takes on power. Power strikes back....
This collusion between big media, conservative commentators, and quack economics is a scam, but it is powerful if it remains unopposed. And we need to support people like Weiner, who have the guts to go after right-wing lunacy at the source.
Please support my friend Anthony. He showed guts. He deserves our support.
Courage,

Alan Grayson

Dear Alan,

Glenn Beck makes your point better that you did. Consider his statement:

"I beg you, look for the words 'social justice' or 'economic justice' on your church Web site. If you find it, run as fast as you can. Social justice and economic justice, they are code words.... 'Communists are on the left, and the Nazis are on the right.' That's what people say. But they both subscribe to one philosophy, and they flew one banner...On each banner, read the words, here in America: 'social justice.'"

Personally, I think Mr. Beck is a lunatic.

- Colonel Clearwater

Dear Colonel Clearwater,

"Faith is no more than developing pathways through doubt. That oil disaster must be stopped, and a way must be found."

I am not the original author of that sensible thought, but it has been my favorite definition of faith for a while. We may all have different belief systems, but commonly we share doubt. While we have no way of certainty for moving past them, working to find a pathway that takes us beyond our doubts is the best option in my view. Scientists do it all the time.

Michael Burke

[Editors Note: Mr. Burke is a retired Clearwater professional civil rights worker.]

Dear Michael,

Thank you for your thoughts. Indeed we are all with you in spirit on stopping this oil leak.

Colonel Clearwater

Dear Colonel Clearwater:

"I think we should just...go back to what our Founders and our founding documents meant. They're quite clear that we would create law based on the God of the Bible and the Ten Commandments. It's pretty simple."

Sarah Palin
Dear Sarah,
I'm sorry to tell you this Sarah, but the Founders did not base the law in this country on the God of the Bible and the Ten Commandments. Its pretty simple and obvious that they did not.
The Founders left the local laws up to the states who based their laws on English common law. The Founders based our government and legal guidelines on a combination of Ancient Roman structure and the ideas of the French writers of the Enlightenment along with two British philosophers of the Enlightenment.
They adopted from Voltaire the idea of freedom of speech and religious tolerance.
From Montesquieu they adopted the idea of separation of powers, and that a free society can only exist where a general diffusion of civic virtue exists.
From the British philosopher John Locke they adopted the idea that government should be the product of the common consent of free and equal men.
The main Founders for the most part where not Christians. They were Deist.
The worldview of Deist is that the Creator made the universe and just let it run by natural laws. The analogy was that the Creator was the watchmaker of the universe; He just created the universe, wound it up like a watch, and then let it run by natural laws. This was the view of Enlightenment thinkers. And this was the view of some of the Founders like Thomas Jefferson, Benjamin Franklin, John Adams, and Tom Paine.
When Thomas Jefferson was about to be elected president in 1800, the Congregationalists minister who was the President of Yale University, said in his sermon that:
Can serious and reflecting men look about them and doubt that, if Jefferson is electedthat those morals which protect our lives from the knife of the assassin, which guard the chastity of our wives and daughters from seduction and violence, defend our property from plunder and devastation and shield our religion from contempt and profanation, will not be trampled upon? For what end?that our churches may become temples of reasonthe Bible cast into a bonfire that we may see our wives and daughters the victims of legal prostitution? Shall our sons become the disciples of Voltaire?
Thomas Jefferson was despised by Christians. To claim that the Founders were quite clear that we would create law based on the God of the Bible and the Ten Commandments is bearing false witness. It is a lie, and therefore a sin.

Colonel Clearwater

Dear Colonel Clearwater,

I know you said that our countrys laws and structure were not founded on the God of the Bible and the Ten commandments. Then how come Congress starts each session with a prayer and the president is sworn in on a Bible?

Wants to Know
Dear Wants to Know,

As I said in an earlier reply, our countrys laws and structure are not based on the God of the Bible and the Ten Commandments, as Sarah Palin and others claim. But our culture is based on Judeo-Christian customs, traditions, and beliefs.
There is no law that says we may not work on Sunday as the Bible tells us. But there is a custom that we honor the Sabbath per our Judeo-Christian beliefs. So most of us do not work on Sunday and some businesses are not open for business on Sunday. But other business are, and some do work on Sunday. The National Football league plays on Sunday. This is a secular custom. Secular here means not related to a religion. So we have a religious custom of not working on Sunday and a secular custom of watching football on Sunday.
Congress opens each session with a prayer; this is a religious custom, not a law. It is a tradition that the President takes his oath on a Bible. The Constitution states that the president must take an oath, but it does not mention anything about a Bible. Taking an oath on a Bible is a tradition based on our Judeo-Christian beliefs. But it is not the law.

Colonel Clearwater

Dear Colonel Clearwater,

I understand you answer, but you say customs and traditions. Arent they the same thing?
Wants to Know More
Dear Wants to Know More,

It is important to realize the difference between a custom and a tradition. A custom is an activity that develops over time from the habits of people. It is a custom at my house that every year we watch football on Thanksgiving Day after we eat.
A tradition is a ceremony invented for the purpose of commemorating some historical event or to develop a sense of binding in a community or religious group.
Thanksgiving Day is a tradition in America that serves the purpose of reminding us of what we have from God for which to be thankful and is loosely based on the first harvest feast of the Pilgrims to celebrate their first year of survival in the New World.
Whether the first Thanksgiving actually took place or not is irrelevant. It is a tradition; a ceremony we use to create a common bond among Americans by commemorating our heritage. Customs can develop out of traditions, such as watching football every Thanksgiving Day.
Last, but not least, are conventions. A convention is a procedure practice by a group.
When Congress meets, the first thing that happens is that the designated speaker calls the group together. This is a convention. Then a prayer is said. This is a custom. If they were to then recite the Pledge of Allegiance, that would be a tradition.
At this point the politicians start to lie. But this is done purely out of habit.

Colonel Clearwater

[Editorial note; As I recall, it is Col. Clearwater's Thanksgiving custom is to eat dinner at my house. Publisher]

Dear Colonel Clearwater,

I am only 8 years old. My teenage sister has a boyfriend who is a year older than she is. Sometimes my sister and her boyfriend take off all their clothes and go behind our barn. Can you tell me what I should do to stop them from peeing on our hay?
Luke McCoy
Dear Luke,

Your facts may be correct, but your conclusion is all wrong.

Colonel Clearwater

Dear Colonel Clearwater,

I have just seen a video about an organization called the Council on Foreign Relations. This organization has members who were past Presidents and past Secretary of States of the United States, plus leaders in the fields of finance, industry, and other important positions in society. The spokesman on the video has concluded that this organization must be a part of world conspiracy to take over the world and put the entire world under a one-world socialist government and I agree with him. What can we do to stop this organization from raining on our parade?
Alex J.

Dear Alex,

Your facts may be correct, but your conclusion is all wrong.
The Council on Foreign Relations (CFR) is an organization of foreign policy experts, people concerned with international trade, prominent historians and writers, as well as others who are involved with foreign policy and international affairs. The CFR hold speaking events with question-and-answer periods which are usually televised on CSpan or other cable stations. The speakers are usually world leaders, historians, writers, or others involved in international affairs. Some of the speakers have included such figures as Nelson Mandela, George Soros, Thomas Friedman, Mikhail Gorbachev, and Ronald Reagan. The CFR publishes a journal six times a year called Foreign Affairs. The journal, which I have subscribed to and read for over 25 years (plus you can buy it at the newsstands in Borders or Barnes and Noble) provides a forum for contrasting views and opinions regarding issues affecting foreign policy.
Some people have made a nice living scarring others with conspiracy theories about the CFR. My advice to you is to go to the store, buy and read their journal, watch their events on CSpan, and be wary of people who wish to sell you on the idea that other people are out to get you.

Colonel Clearwater

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Dear Colonel Clearwater:

Cancel my subscription to your liberal rage. To quote Rudy Giuliani, "A nuclear-free world has been a 60-year dream of the Left, just like socialized healthcare." Keep your damn pipedreams!

Wilma G.

Madame G.

"A nuclear world war cannot be won and must never be fought. And no matter how great the obstacles may seem, we must never stop our efforts to reduce the weapons of war. We must never stop at all until we see the day when nuclear arms have been banished from the face of this earth." Ronald Wilson Reagan, 1984

Colonel Clearwater

Dear Colonel Clearwater:

Liberals? I am as liberal as they come, but i gotta ask - WHO would not be outraged by this MURDER? We financed this murdering of defenseless fish in a barrel. I could not be more ashamed of the human race at this moment. I realize that there is collateral damage in war, but this is no less than cold-blooded genocide. Shame on us for allowing this to happen on our watch!

Mac McNamara

Dear Colonel Clearwater:

It is tragic, very, very tragic. But what is written by the editors gives the impression, it seems, that these soldiers were out joy riding. That is not the case. they did not fire until they were given permission to fire. They operated by the book.
The soldiers are not abnormal men in a normal situation. They are normal men in an abnormal situation.
Damn the people who started the Iraqi war atrocity and damn the Americans who supported this war. The blood is on their hands.

If you supported this war, even without giving it much thought, it is no different that the German people who supported the war against Poland, France, Holland, Belgium, etc. It was done one country at a time. Complacently saying, "We should do it. We agree," without much thought is no different than the German people who followed Hitler. The blood is on your hands. In fact, it's worse, because the German people did not have all the information and they had no choice in the matter.

In this country the politicians can't invade other countries without popular support. Let's beg God's mercy that we don't get what we deserve.

John Ruane

Dear Mac and John,

Thank you both for your thoughts. We forwarded the WikiLeak link to some of our readers. The journalism has been reported flawless. Obtaining the video is journalism at its best. The WikiLink written comments added at the end of the film interpret the video to fit a preconceived notion.

The soldiers were not shooting at civilians. They were shooting at insurgents who, upon later investigation, turned out to be civilians. By saying the soldiers were shooting civilans implies that they knew they were shooting civiliansj. This is not a moot point. By putting the blame on the soldiers, one is absolving the real guilty party. The real guilty party are those who convinced the American public that this war was necessary and just. Any American who supported a country who did not attack us, must share responsibility. In the words of the Greek writer Euripides:

When the people vote on war, nobody reckons
On his own death; it is too soon; he thinks
Some other man will meet that wretched fate.
But if death faced him when he cast his votes,
Hellas would never perish from battle-madness.
And yet we men all know which of two words
Is better, and can weigh the good and the bad
They bring: how much better is peace than war!
First and foremost, the Muses love her best;
And the goddess of vengeance hates her. She delights
In healthy children, and she glories in wealth.
But wickedly we throw all this away
To start our wars and make the losers slaves--
Man binding man and city chaining city.

--Euripides, Suppliant Women
(Hellas is the name for Greece)

Other readers are invited to watch the video. Beware. It's the bloodiest thing I've seen since Antitem. Link to Wikileak and Video

Colonel Clearwater

Dear Colonel Clearwater:

Thanks for reporting the WikiLeak video. Can you tell me how the "Smallest of the World's Leading Newspapers" managed to scoop "Florida's Best Newspaper?"

Pedro Techador

Dear Pedro,

Always nice to hear from one of the Techadors.

This was a WikiLeak scoop. Two of the killed journalists in the incident worked for Reuters. Reuters tried to get the video by using the Freedom of Information Act without success. The WikiLeak whistle-blower group got it.

It costs some sixty bucks for us to buy stock photos from Reuters. We haven't bought any yet, but the resource is available. The out-of-town newspaper you referred to, the St. Petersburg Times, charges us $200 for the same service. We haven't bought any photo rights from them either.

But the point is,we scooped them because we are small, quick and agile and can tell the tale. They are slow, cumbersome and "too big to tale."

The video is quite graphic and explosive. It will be interesting to see if the out-of-town paper will report it tomorrow. Consider yourself (at least) one day smarter than the other guy's readers.

Colonel Clearwater

Dear Colonel Clearwater,
You say you are a colonel. Whats your army? I think youre just the leader of Sergeant Peppers Bleeding Hearts Club Band?

I bet you think we havent reached enough equality in this country already. I bet you think Glen Beck is just a low I.Q. glorified game show host. I bet you think that we arent the best educated country on earth. You probably even think that Obama was born in this country and that his birth certificate, vaccine records, and school records are real.

It is because of people like you that Americas are never satisfied and are always looking to improve things.

A true conservative

Dear A:

Yes!
Colonel Clearwater

Dear Colonel Clearwater:

What I dislike most about Obamacare though is this notion that the leftists in Washington think that they can pass this thing through, cram it through, with disregard to consider the will of the people, disregard of these constitutional legal traditional processes which have thus far been used in America's processes to allow policy to be adopted that do adhere to the will of the people.
Sarah Palin

Dear Ms. Palin:

Your statement reminds me of what Republican Congressman, Devin Nunes said during the health care vote.

"For most of the 20th century people fled the ghosts of communist dictators. And now you are bringing the ghosts back into this chamber."

There is no polite way to get around this. Tea Party Patriots are morons when it comes to history, economics, and how to run a society. You chose the Barracuda theme song. Have you ever listened to the words? Tiki Parrot's photo illustration video, though not artfully titled, says it best. Colonel Clearwater

Dear Colonel Clearwater:

What's going on with The Tea Party movement. And what do you think about the health care vote.

Carlos Techador

Dear Senor Techador:

Your letter caused quite a stir in the pressroom. The editor and the political editor got into quite an argument about how to answer. When the publisher chimed in, the editor cut off a piece of his ear and I stepped in.

Tea Party Patriots are about nostalgia for the days of white power. Much like the resurgence of the Ku Klux Klan after World War I, the Tea Party Patriots are people who believe they have lost their privileged status in American society and wish to thwart others hopes for the American dream.
Unfortunately, or fortunately (depending on which editor yells loudest) President Obama considers Wall Street, the banks, the Republicans in congress, and those with tea party policies as necessary players in the solution when they are, in fact, part of the problem.

Colonel Clearwater

Dear Colonel Clearwater:

The House of Representatives is going to pass the new health care bill without a vote Sunday. Is that legal? Isn't this act proof that President Obama isn't effective.

M.S. Floyd

Dear Mr. Floyd.

I can tell that you watch Faux News. This procedure is quite legal. It's been used by Republicans more often than Democrats. Both the Senior Citizens' Right to Work Act and the Family Medical Leave Act were passed this way. As a rule I don't quote fools, but even Glen Beck has admitted that the process IS a vote.

"They are going to VOTE for this damn thing on a Sunday, which is the Sabbath, during Lent... This is an affront to God." [emphasis added]

The United States has no established religion. Many religions have the Sabbath on Saturdays. For others, every day is a sabbath. At the inception of the Obama administration, Faux News communicated questioningly that the president was a terrorists because of a "fist bump" and that he was not really the president because of a few flubbed words in the oath ceremony.

What the administration is doing is creating a major reform of the the Amrican health care system. No one has ever done this before. The entrenched interests of the docs and the hospitals (the doc's workshop) have always prevented this. It's a major accomplishment.

That being said, there are problems with the bill. Psychiatrists are feeding at the trough more. This is especially worrisome since the Book of Human Ills - the list of treatable diseases - has a host of new ailments. There are people who are angry people. Now, it's a disease - Intermittent explosive disorder . Years ago, it was drapetomania - an slave's urge to escape captivity.

We will know on Sunday just how much health care is left in the bill after it's adopted. We urge the president to pursue major reform of the drug companies next.

In the mean time, I would suggest that you find a new news source. I recommend the BBC.

Colonel Clearwater

I've heard that Bill Gates has spent millions on developing a vaccine against malaria. I've heard some rumors, but was wondering if you know the facts.
Billy G.
Dear Billy,
It exists. The "Microsoft Vaccine" [my words, not Bill's] is in its last trial phase, called "Phase 3." Exactly how good Vacine 1.3 is has not been published. However, Mr. Gates reports that within three years, Vacine 2013 will be "partly effective." A fully effective vaccine, will not exist for 5 to 10 years, according to a recent BBC report.

More people have been killed by mosquitoes than all the bullets in war. Any effectiveness will save lives. Lets hope that the Vista Vaccine is better than the Vista software. I may sound sour here, not nearly sour as some. Look at this pie chart graphic.
Colonel Clearwater

Dear Colonel Clearwater:

Did President Obama move faster with the Haiti earthquake victims than President Bush did with the Katrina hurricane victims?

Bambi Baird

Dear Bambi;

Yes, Bambi, he did. He even moved faster than Mr. Bush did on 9/11. President Obama is smart and his hands are full. Mr. Bush was slow and his head was empty.

Colonel Clearwater

Dear Colonel Clearwater:

I'm worried. What's the biggest problem facing our country? Conservatism, Liberalism, religious extremism or corporatism? (I'm an Obama man, please withhold my name. Our boss has taken revenge against others like me.)

An American Patriot

Dear Mr. Patriot:

There is no truth to the rumor that the root word of "patriot" is riot. I saw the survey.

The Founding Fathers were both conservative and liberals, and they made sure in the Constitution that religious extremists would never gain authority of the laws. But corporatism didn't exist back then. It has ruined our economy with phony finance and by shipping our industry overseas. Corporatism's greed is at the core of every U.S. problem from debt, healthcare, prisons and education.

Colonel Clearwater

Dear Colonel Clearwater:

A recent Yahoo survey said the way to balance the national debt and lower the country's deficit is through the elimination of waste. What do you think? Doc Deveruaux

Dear Doc:

YaaaaaaaHooooooooooo!!!! I saw the survey. That 81% of the people think cutting waste and fraud would be enough to balance the budget and lower the debt is the problem. These things are just a drop in the bucket to the deficit and debt. The public is unbelievablely unknowledgeable. That is the problem.

Colonel Clearwater

Dear Colonel Clearwater:

Back when I got into journalism, the idea that a fistfight in a newsroom would turn into a news story was unthinkable. The guys in the sports department at the New York Daily News, they had so many, you wouldn't even look up. What's your paper's policy on hitting reporters?
Henry Allen

Dear Mr. Allen

I saw where you expressed surprise at coverage of your punching a reporter over at WaPo. It's similar here at the Sun. In fact, we have a sign posted in our news room that says "The beatings will continue until morale improves."

Colonel Clearwater

Dear Colonel Clearwater,

I'm confused. President Obama won the Nobel Peace Prize but didn't do anything to deserve it. I think he just won because he was a Democrat. What do you think?

Sincerely,

Johnnie R.

Dear Johnnie;

Henry Kissinger, a Republican, won the Nobel Peach Prize too. And this even though 21,000 American soldiers died AND we invaded Cambodia. All on his watch.

Col. Clearwater

Dear Colonel Clearwater,

Hi. I have Windows Vista and I hate it. It has been glitchy and a pain to use. Now they're coming out with something new to replace that dog. I need you advice. Should I stay with Vista or should I get the new stuff?

Sincerely,

Suzie

Dear Suzie;

You're not the only one who feels that way. Here's what you should do. Get a Mac and forget about Windows. If you can't do that, get ride of windows and reinstall XP. As far as Windows 7 is concerned, the Sun computer consultant, Kelly Wilson, says "Wait six months for Microsoft to get the bugs out." Given their sordid history of shipping products with problems, this sounds like good advice. If you need installation help or repairs give Kelly a call. 727-641-3764. He's a wizard.

Col. Clearwater

Dear Colonel Clearwater,

Hi. I'm a liberal and I have heard Glen Beck speak on monopoly and such.

What he says makes me feel bad, but he seems so confident.

Should I take him seriously?

Sincerely,

Mac Heart of Clearwater

Dear Mac,

An oligarchy is similar to a monopoly except that instead of a one owner monopoly there are two, three or a few.

As to Mr. Beck, ignore his addictions and treatment. Ignore the fact that family members have become sick or committed suicide. Ignore his attention deficit disorder and his racist comments.

We should let Mr. Beck's words stand for themselves:

"O-- L-- I --G --A --R-- H. One letter is missing...The one that's missing is Y. I don't know if we're turning into an oligarchy or what we're turning into. But unless you ask "Why?" we're going to transform into something."

And now you can ignore Mr. Beck.

Colonel Clearwater

<===================>

Dear Colonel Clearwater,

I am in trouble with my bank on the mortgage. I was thinking about getting help from a loan modification helping company, but I'm worried about scams. What do you think"

Buck Turgeson

Dear Buck;

The Sun's editor, LD Sledge recently wrote the following. I hope it helps. Good luck to you.

"What is loan modification?

A mortgage lender may modify the mortgage for a homeowner in one or more of the following ways: Interest rate reduction, extension of loan terms, delinquent payment forgiveness, conversion of adjustable rate into fixed rate loans, principal reduction, and forbearance agreements.

Any of these methods can help the stressed homeowner on the brink of foreclosure and bankruptcy. Over ten percent of the homeowners in the United States are in foreclosure because they cannot pay their mortgage note on time. Many are in denial about their situation and refusing to accept their plight, they are paying their monthly note from their retirement or savings.

Everyone is a candidate for loan modification, even if they are not behind on payments. It doesnt affect ones credit. Some feel it is demeaning to even consider it, preferring to go into foreclosure, which is a stain on ones credit forever, and is worse than bankruptcy.

Banks do not want to own or hold property. They will compromise to avoid having a house in their inventory, and will negotiate. The government also pays the companies servicing mortgages for every loan they modify.

There are reputable loan modification experts who will help the beleaguered home owner who know how to negotiate the best deal for the homeowner. They charge a fixed fee, which varies between negotiation companies. Getting the interest reduced substantially, the monthly payments lowered, and delinquent payments forgiven can make a huge difference in a family budget, and a standard of living.

Dealing with the bank or mortgage company can be daunting. The individual homeowner may achieve a fair result, but he or she usually lacks experience needed to effect a significant change. It would pay to investigate these possibilities, and find a reputable company to negotiate the modification."

Colonel Clearwater, C.S.A., Rtd.

Dear Colonel Clearwater:

Thanks for answering my last letter on torture. Any updates since then?

Have the Republicans admitted wrongdoing?

Phil Chestnut

Dear Phil;

No change.

Condoleezza Rice said "[President Bush] was very clear that we would do nothing -- nothing -- that was against the law or against our obligations internationally... He was only willing to authorize policies that were legal in order to protect the country," As Secretary of State, she was among the top Bush advisers who gave a green light to waterboarding. Reminds me of another, similar quote.

"When the president does it, that means it is not illegal," by Richard M. Nixon.

Colonel Clearwater

Dear Colonel Clearwater:

What's the big deal with torturing our 911 enemies in Iraq? Dick Cheney says the information worked and that President Obama should release the secret documents that say torture should work. What's your take on this?

Phil Chestnut

Dear Mr. Chestnut:

The former vice-president should not be airing the contents of any secret federal documents. I believe that's a crime. Secondly, his boss once said,

"Torture anywhere is an affront to human dignity everywhere... I call on all governments to join with the United States and the community of law-abiding nations in prohibiting, investigating, and prosecuting all acts of torture." George W. Bush, June 2003

If the shoe fits....

Colonel Clearwater

Dear Colonel Clearwater:

Hey man! Obama is raising taxes on wealthy Americans up to a whopping 39.6%. That has to be socialism. It's looks to me like Rush was right again. As usual. What does your liberal rag of a newspaper have to say?

Please withhold my name. I work for a guy who actually likes your paper and I don't want to get axed. I saw where you did this for a democrat, I hope you have the integrity to do it for a republican.

Name Withheld by Request

Dear Withhold,

Obama isn't raising taxes on the rich. He's rolling the rate back in the direction it used to be.

End of Ronald Reagan's first term: 50%.

Under the administration of Richard Nixon: 70%.

In the administration of Dwight Eisenhower: 91%

"I hope he fails!" is the mantra of your party.

In the Clinton years it was "Get Clinton." No nominations approved, just tons of money spent to prosecute the man for an investment in which he lost some $80,000. There was a time when presidential sex lives were not part of the public press. Then a girl was egged into not sending her dress to the cleaners. This was not about the good of the country. It was about achieving a political agenda and the public good be damned. And that's where we are again. It's time to instill confidence, not to undermine it. Instead it will be four more years of astro-turfing, Faux News and rallying behind a moron to reinstate another era of greed, torture and war.

Colonel Clearwater

Dear Colonel Clearwater:

Republicans are touting Rush Limbaugh as the philosophical and intellectual lynch pin of their party; a paragon of political analysis; and an all around good egg. What is your opinion?

Carlos Techador

Dear Seor Techador:

Thank you for your kind inquiry. I think Mr. Limbaugh is a raving lunatic who has helped trash the party of Abraham Lincoln. He is partly responsible for my leaving the party and joining the Bull Moose Party (which, alas, has expired in recent years, making me an independent.) I also think he is a great source of amusement. For example, this recent diatribe: "Jake Tapper is the one guy that's outside of the butt boy bubble in the White House press room." Colonel Clearwater

Dear Colonel Clearwater:

What do you think of this?
There is a bill right now being introduced to the Florida Senate that would require all dogs and cats to be neutered by the age of four months. This would eliminate all the responsible hobby breeders, such as myself, from Florida, as we would not be able to pay the hundreds of dollars yearly required to keep intact animals. I would no longer breed Silkys. When you would be ready for your next dog, you would have to go out of state. And Florida's success in passage would embolden the Animal Rightists -- these are the guys who feel that you and your dog have EQUAL rights -- and they would work all the harder harder to get similar bills passed in every state. So then where would you get your next dog?
Now is the time to stand up and say -- no. California tried to pass such a bill requiring mandatory spay/neuter last year and it did not pass because there was a groundswell of outrage against it. I urge you, if you value your rights as a dog owner to contact your State Representative and State Senator and say no -- and tell them why.
I have attached excellent sample letters from the AKC to help you. They do need to be personalized, however! You can find your State Representative and State Senator by going on www.myforida.com.

So please, if you value your rights as a dog owner, let Tallahassee know loud and clear how you feel. Not only I thank you, but your next dog will thank you too.

Best, Sandy Mesmer

www.sandymesmer.com
www.bergstromgallery.com

Dear Sandy,

Thank you for your letter. I find Mr. Randolph's bill somewhat baffling. The proposed law penalizes pet owners across the board, whether they are responsible in regard to breeding or not. It also comes down heavily on mutts. I like mutts. They often come from the deep end of the gene pool. Here are forms to write both senators and representatives. Form Letter for Senator

Form Letter For Representative

Colonel Clearwater

Dear Colonel Clearwater:

If you're a Clearwater newspaper how come I can't find your paper anywhere? And how come your mail goes to Safety Harbor. What are you? Some kind of "out-of-town" newspaper?

C.P.

Dear Mr.CP:

For the print edition, send $25 to my agent, Moons of Pluto publishing company for a subscription (address above). It includes a free ad, link, obituary, etc. My agent has a Safety Harbor address because it's closer to his Clearwater home. The Sun is a Clearwater paper.

Colonel Clearwater

Dear Colonel Clearwater:

I see where a journalist, an Iraqi cameraman, threw his shoes at President Bush. This seems pretty outrageous to me. Isn't this a crime in Iraq? I mean, isn't the guy toast?

Do you guys at the Sun ever do anything rash?

Melvin Shatz

Dear Mr. Shatz:

Ohhhhh! That is a tough question. The US has promised freedom of speech for Iraq following the fall of Saddam, according to the Iraq press. Throwing shoes at someone is the worst insult an Arab can hurl. The TV station the guy worked for is arguing for his release on those grounds. He is being interrogated, so it is possible he is being tortured. The Human Rights Watch has reported that Iraq justice is failing in the fall of Saddam with pretrial torture, no speedy trial and no provision for an effective defense attorney. Of course on the other hand, if he had thrown his shoes at Saddam, death by pecking of crows would likely have been administered summarily.

We never do anything rash here at the Sun. But reporters used to be rash. In fact, back in the eighties the paper had a motto "We're Making News." We parody that with our extra editions ("We're Making Gnus" and "We Print All the Gnus That Fit.")

Currently, we do not prosecute presidential insulters in the USA. In our culture, however, throwing shoes at someone would be an assault (and battery if the shoes had hit the target).

You know how Barack Obama says that we only have one president at a time? Well Representative Barney Frank said that Barack Obama "...overstates the number of presidents we have."

By the way, our president was recently shoed in effigy in Iran."

Colonel Clearwater

Dear Colonel Clearwater:

I see where people accuse you of being a "liberal rag." I live out of town and haven't seen enough of your paper issues to form an opinion. I can say that your newspaper does seem like a cross between Boy's Life and The Onion.

Ron Saper

Dear Mr. Saper:

Thank you for your polite letter. Others are often more like Jerry Springer Show participants. I enclose a back issue for your enjoyment.

Colonel Clearwater

The artist, who can be seen approaching, makes her living from the sale of photographs. The important thing to realize is that when someone photographs their work (photos, art, whatever) it hurts their business and deprives them of income from their images.

Valuable links for election information:

Political truth-o-meter

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